As we are approaching a time of truth, the eclipses, the outside circumstances push us to become ourselves more and more, to drop the mask, the pretending to be such or such, to smile when you want to cry. Time to be real, time to shine in our incarnation even if we think that this is less than acceptable. Because as we are, we are and it should be celebrated as no one before you has had your life, your features, your way of seeing the world.
Our time on earth is nothing in comparison with the time the Universe started and what do the majority of us do? We thrive to change ourselves because we think we are inadequate. Every person who chooses consciously to bring the light to a new soul should have a notice saying that they should encourage their child to live their lives as they intend and to remind them how loved they are. That would save us the atrocities we see daily on our screens, in our houses, in the streets, close and far away.
Then if we are lucky we start on the path of spirituality…whatever the world means for you. Because we are all spirits in a body structure…the only thing to do is just be, be yourself whatever the others think. Chances are, if they judge us ,they judge themselves. How do I know because this is what I did a lot and nowadays less but still. I am my own worst enemy and the way I speak to myself is at times horrendous. I have done enough self-analysing to know where it is coming from and I am not here to blame anyone because the truth being said, being a parent is certainly the hardest job on the planet (providing you fulfil your role) and I am not one.
As I have been challenged into looking at my shadow to speak nicely (a harshest version would be my shit!)the last few months even more than ever (and I know you too!), I come face to face with myself thanks to the many tools I have used the last few months/years (therapists, ceremonies, deep healing…)and I am simply tired of self-abusing and running away because I just don’t love myself…
I again won’t go into the details of what but if you are perceptive you have noticed the many stages I had to go through the last few years mainly, and this morning on this partial eclipse, I have decided it is enough to be who you think I might be but that somehow I am not. I am not playing any games anymore with myself or anyone. I am growing into myself and if people do not like it then good we spend less time together because, really, do you want to spend time with someone who does not like the You they have in front of them?
I choose to love myself regardless of what I perceive in the mirror or if people tell me they like me or not. I have tried to escape this body, this mind, these emotions. I want to laugh and actually I am smiling as I am writing these words as I have tried nearly everything on the planet to heal myself. But what does it mean exactly when I write that? It means I have tried to find a way back to my essence regardless of the conditioning. I still have many demons and deep anchored patterns that are not mine (I know because my body has been telling me for 25 years!), but I am aware of them more and more. I break free. Writing these words reinforce that statement. I am me, I say what I need to say, I ask for what I need without thinking I am too much, I eat what I want when I want, and please do not ask me what I eat, how many hours I sleep and how much yoga I do a day because this is my path, my body, my story…Find your own inner guru. Do not rely on anyone. Remember the 5th statement of the 5 agreements: listen to anyone but stay sceptical. You only have the truth. You only know what you should be doing but the truth is: we are way too scared to follow our hearts especially when it goes against most of the societal and family’s structures. So we ask others hoping they will give the same answer we have in our head…if they don’t, suddenly we are not friends anymore or you are not the teacher I thought you were…That is the problem, my dear. I am not who you think I am because I am still trying to find her and love her.
I wish you courage on the path of self-discovery. The road is not without bumps but at the end it is worth it. You are worth it. Life is short and we do not want to be on our deathbed thinking we should have followed that dream, or re-contacted that person…if…if… We have a saying in French that says…with many ifs we could put Paris in a bottle…not sure how to translate that but I am sure you get the meaning.
Celebrate who you are. Drop the mask. Let us meet each other as we are and not how we would like to be seen or with judgements. Let’s get naked (I hope you understand this is not to be taken literally) and lets’s love what is…what we are.
May you be well.